To be successful in life and in business, whether you work for someone else or yourself, the rules have changed and they’ve changed because more people are coming to realize that they want to have it all and won’t compromise on other areas of their lives. But this group of people are the minority because adopting this approach requires a big change in mindset, which for many is quite a hefty task.
Gone are the days when driven men and women had to trade off their true identity to be a success. I call the stereotypical work hard, play hard ethic, be strong and get things done without letting emotion creep in, ‘head-driven success’. In essence, the head makes the rules based on material gain, beating the competition and the survival of the fittest. This is how many goals have been achieved but in today’s world, being headdriven creates economic downturns, depression and an inability to get the results that were once rife.
On the other hand, there is what I call ‘heart driven success’, a way of being rather than a way of doing. It’s an opportunity to achieve excellent results, in a way which doesn’t compromise your integrity, your sanity or other important areas of your life. The truth is we no longer live in what used to be called a ‘man’s world’. The world is changing and will continue to do so – now it’s a matter of optimal importance to move with the times and embrace new ways of doing things.
Heart-driven success has many aspects to it. Today, I want to share with you one of the fundamental principles, that when adopted has the ability to unquestionably change your life and the way you work forever. As I said previously, success no longer has to come at the price of other areas of your life, but it’s going to take a shift in your perspective, behaviour and actions to get you there. If you know deep down you were born to be successful, the shift required is from letting the head lead the way to being guided by your heart, this is the essence of heart-driven success.
Imagine this. You’re running around at a hundred miles an hour, getting stuff done, attending to everyone’s needs but your own, your head is telling you to keep on going but your heart is telling you to stop. You’re running on empty but your head which drives your success knows that if you stop, everything stops, including the success you crave. When you think of giving yourself some space, some time off, it’s an absolute impossibility. How will the cogs keep turning without you at the helm overseeing things? So you keep on going for another day and another and another. Until finally your body decides it can’t go on anymore and puts you in your sick bed. Now you’re no good to anyone and all you can do is lay on your back, fretting over what needs to get done. You have now not only created devastation in your own life but you’ve also compromised the lives of your family and the people you work with and anyone else you care to mention.
When the heart leads the way, it takes into account everyone’s needs, primarily your own. As the saying on an aeroplane goes “put your oxygen mask on first, then assist others”. If you’re not here, you’re no good to anyone, but when you make sure your needs are met first, you fill your tank with enough fuel to get everything done and you add an extra spark and zing into your own life which rubs off on others.Heart-driven success ensures that you take plenty of time out to nurture and nourish you, which in turn fills you up with enough fuel to ensure you can give in all the areas that are important to you.
Here is an essential new driver for you to consider: ‘nothing time’.
‘Nothing time’ is my absolute favourite way of being rather than a way of doing and is a stipulation in all of my clients’ diaries. This is where you block out a minimum of one full hour a week for you to do, you guessed it, nothing!! No plans go in this space, you simply do what you want to do for you, something which recharges your batteries and doesn’t involve anyone else. Go for a walk, read a book, lie down, do some yoga, go for lunch in your favourite cafe, paint, sculpt, dance, sing, write music, take the time to just breathe… wherever the mood takes you in that moment. The only rule is that it is just for you and it must nourish and nurture you. Over time, increase the amount of ‘nothing time’ you allocate in your schedule, getting to the point of making it a daily activity. Your body, brain and business will love you for it. The people around you will also reap the rewards as you show up as a calmer, creative and more confident you.
This concept may initially arouse some concerns. This is good because it gives you an opportunity to challenge your current way of living and that of society. For most people the thought of taking this precious time for themselves fills them with dread, guilt. Statements like “How on earth can I consider myself when I have so many other people to think of?”, “How could I possibly take an hour away from my busy schedule to do something non constructive?”, “This will never work for me” and others, are sure to rear their heads. You have to invest the time in yourself and invest in the effort to make it happen. Change can be difficult, which is why many people don’t change their whole lives! But once you get used to living this way and it becomes a natural way of being for you, you will notice how much easier and how much fun success is. But that’s not to say you don’t have to work at it because you do. Heart-driven success is a new way of ‘being’, which allows for a new way of ‘having’, go on give it a try
